3 Tips for Self-Confidence

We all want to feel confident as much as possible.  And there are some simple ways to do just that.  Follow these three tips, and you’ll notice your self-confidence start to soar.

Do What Makes You Stand Out
What makes you unique?  What can you do that puts you above most other people?  Is it singing?  Giving a presentation?  Fixing machines?  Dancing?  Find 2-3 things that make you shine and that you know you can succeed in and consistently do these things to make you look good and build your confidence.

Say No When You Mean No
Many people say yes to everything anyone asks them to do.  These passive people want to please others and make them happy.  If you do this on a regular basis, stop!  You’ve probably felt anger on the inside when others walk all over you and take advantage of you.  You may have even burst out with negative, hateful talk when you’ve given and given and given and no one pays attention to what you want and need.  Now, sometimes you do need to put others’ needs above your own, such as if you’re caring for children, a sick relative or friend, or an elderly or disabled person.  In those cases, their needs do come first (and it’s important to take some time for yourself too).

But with all others, think about whether you truly want to do what others ask.  Let your yes be yes and your no be no.  You can just say no, “No, I’m not able to do as you ask,” or you can give an excuse, “No, I won’t be able to because I have to pick Johnny up from baseball practice then.”  Another way to say no is to be vague using phrases such as, “No, I’m busy then” or “I’m sorry I have to say no because I have other commitments.”  Even if the “other commitment” is being home by yourself and pampering yourself, that’s fine.  If the other person pushes you to find out exactly what you are busy doing or what other commitments you have, continue to be vague with other phrases, “I’m sorry, but I have other things I need to do then” or “My schedule is too busy to help you.”  Eventually, they’ll get the hint.

When you set boundaries like this, you understand your capabilities and are able to handle your life as you wish.  You become more confident as you know your limits and can stand up for yourself.

Review Three Things Every Evening
That You Did Well That Day
Ending the day with thoughts of what you did well helps build your self-respect.  Set aside a few minutes to review the events of the day.  Close your eyes and relax.  In your mind’s eye, go through what happened.  Begin with the morning, then move to the afternoon, and finish with the evening.  Observe the events that took place, the people who were in your life during the day, any decisions you made, and any successes that took place.

Be thankful for all the good things that happened and that you accomplished.  Notice at least three things that were successful for you or that you did well that day.  Be grateful for everything that you felt good about, big or small.  You can also note the things you’d do differently the next time.

An evening review helps you identify everything good that happens in your life as well as how you can improve in the future.

These are just some of the skills I teach in my online courses.  You can learn more about these courses here.